Good Day! And welcome to yet another day of not being dead!
Odd way to begin a column, think you? Well, consider the source, but my excuse for today is that we appear to have struck a collective nerve by swerving into the nether world of “long-term care.”
My original intention was simply to provide a modicum of information regarding payment for LONG-term care in a skilled nursing facility, but it seems that this something that a lot of us have on our minds, and good for us! Historically, the “problem” I encountered most often was that folks had no idea what “long-term” care even meant, or thought that it was strictly a synonym for “nursing home care,” so we were always beginning at the beginning in the midst of a crisis.
Pat yourselves on the back! (OK, that’s enough)
Let’s hit “pause” for a moment and be sure that we’re all talking about the same thing: When I say “long-term care,” I mean that somebody is going to need some level of “care” for a very long time, or permanently – That could mean everything from an occasional ride to a doctor appointment and maybe a little help keeping the prescriptions straight, to 24/7 care in a nursing home – But, the fact is, most of the time it means something in-between.
The vast majority of us will NOT end up in nursing homes! True, we may need to be in one for “x” amount of time while we recover or rehab-back from this-or-that medical event, but on a permanent basis? No; besides, more and more “long-term care” can be provided (and IS provided!) right there at home. So, smart people start looking around at “home” to see if the only bathroom is UPstairs, etc – Or, they start considering what they could do to prevent the likelihood of falling over, because falls put more of us in conditions and places where we don’t want to be than Alzheimer’s ever has!
But smart people will also figure out that “long-term care” can be pricey, wherever you are! (…unless, of course, you happen to have an unlimited cadre’ of family and friends who are ready, willing and oh-so-enthusiastic about the prospect of spending significant chunks of their lives taking care of you…hmm…)
So, smart people will begin to realize that what they don’t know can hurt them; so, Smart People try this: Go to http://longtermcare.gov/ and just cruise around – Take your time – Just figuring out the right questions to ask is a HUGE step forward!
Do I think this is the “perfect” web site on the subject? No. I think it tends to push long-term care insurance, which certainly can be a great answer for some folks in some circumstances, but hopelessly unaffordable for others. I also think it tends to be a little “fear based,” and I don’t happen to think that most of us think well when we’re scared, but I do think it does a good job of laying out things to think about, possible strategies, etc – In other words, I think it does a good job of helping us to understand the right questions, including the right questions to ask ourselves.
So, go ahead – Go to http://longtermcare.gov/ and just look around and make some notes. Some of those notes will be questions, because smart people have questions, so e-mail them to me or call any of the numbers at the end of this column and ask your questions – Ask as many as you want and keep asking them until you understand the answers. Do NOT rely on what you heard at the coffee shop this morning or from your brother-in-law in Biloxi, because bad info is often worse than NO info.
Now, do me a favor and back-up, mentally, because here’s another thing that Smart People know: Life is meant to be lived – And loved. Laugh! Celebrate this crazy thing called “life!” Enjoy it! Do things that make you feel good about you! Planning for the future is smart, but losing “today” out of fear about “tomorrow” is just…A waste.
One last thought for today, then I’ll leave you to your own, web-based devices: The people who know the MOST about “long-term care” are caregivers – People who took care of people who needed to be taken care of, whether they liked it or not. Most of us have been, are or will be “caregivers,” or we’ve at least been close enough to it to see it.
Most of us have learned (or will learn) a great deal from that experience; now, reverse the roles: If it were you who needed to be taken care of, how would you want things to be different? What would you done differently? How would you have planned differently? How would you have acted differently?
That, my friends, is how Smart People get smarter.
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