Regardless of the meteorological fact that “Spring” officially began on March 20th, most of us will believe it when we see it, but the fact is that the weather isn’t as bad or as cold or as wet as it was not long ago.
And certainly the days are longer, so we begin to emerge (in one way or another) from the cocoons we built in late Fall to prepare for Winter, where most life is inside; funny, too, because our minds and hearts focus more on “inside” – Internal, quiet, insulated – Cocooned.
But whether we’re “inside people” or “outside people” or, as is the case with most of us, some combination thereof, life seems to begin again – We “emerge,” to rejoin the world. “Life” returns. “Light” returns, so, sometimes, we see things a little more…Clearly.
Most of us heard about the “Mickey Rooney thing” a while back. The short version is that Mr. Rooney appears to have been the victim of “financial exploitation.” There are a number of definitions of “financial exploitation,” but the National Center for Elder Abuse defines it as “…the illegal taking, misuse or concealment of funds, property or assets of a vulnerable elder,” and that’s as good a definition as any.
In other words, somebody comes along and “takes over:” Sometimes it’s an “outsider,” a “predator,” a lowlife who has made it her or his business to put her or his nose into an elder’s business, usually under the guise of “caregiver” – Or lover. It isn’t “theft,” in the sense of pick-it-up-and-walk-out-the-door, it’s a little at a time – My car broke down, the “collectors” are after me, my niece needs emergency surgery, I can’t afford the rent, I can’t afford a coat, I can’t afford a fur coat – And, on and on and on – “Til it’s all gone, and so are they.
Often, though, it’s a friend or a neighbor – Or most often: Family. That’s right, “family – Maybe “blood,” maybe by marriage, whatever, but Family – The people you are supposed to be able to trust. And it almost always starts by “helping” – Helping pay the bills, helping to figure out the insurance, helping to take you to the bank, helping to take-care-of-business, helping to manage all that annoying paperwork – Helping. Helping themselves.
Maybe early dementia or memory loss is involved, maybe it isn’t; it certainly wasn’t with Mr. Rooney. It was the slow, insidious taking-over of an elder’s money and assets – Of an elder’s life. And if you don’t think that happens in our little towns and rural areas, wake up and smell the roses, because I’ve seen it happen for years.
Shortly after Mr. Rooney’s act of incredible courage, the Financial Crimes Enforcement Network, which is under the U.S. Department of the Treasury, issued an “advisory” to financial institutions on what to watch out for to stop financial exploitation. Yes, I realize that most of us don’t work for financial institutions, but it’s a pretty darned good list of things that friends and family – The “good guys” – Can watch out for, too, so here you go:
- Frequent large withdrawals, which could include maxing-out ATM withdrawals, on a daily basis;
- “Insufficient funds” – All of a sudden;
- Uncharacteristic non-payment of bills, or uncharacteristic attempts to wire large sums of money;
- Debit transactions that seem “out of character” (…because they are);
- Closing CD’s or accounts, without regard to penalties.
Yes, I know: A lot of us might not “see” that kind of thing, but here are some things we might see:
- A “caregiver” (or whomever) seems to be particularly interested in an elder’s finances, or doesn’t allow him or her to speak for herself/himself – Or won’t leave their side during conversations;
- An elder seems, suddenly, fearful or submissive, or seems worried about eviction or “ending up in a nursing home” if money isn’t given to…;
- A new “caregiver,” relative or “friend” suddenly begins conducting business on behalf of an elder, without having all the “…ducks in a row;”
- The elder seems to move away from old, long relationships and toward new “friends” – Or strangers;
- All of a sudden, he or she doesn’t seem to know what’s going on with his or her business, and doesn’t want to talk about it;
- Suddenly, there’s a new person with a new power-of-attorney, or whatever…
- …and on and on and on…
If it smells bad, it probably is.
What do you do? Well, if you see something that seems to be illegal, CALL THE COPS! There is no penalty for being wrong.
If you see things that look like any of the things listed back – Things that seem, or feel, “wrong, call Adult Protective Services at 1-866-ENDHARM (1-866-363-4276) now – Right now.
Can I promise you that these folks can stop the abuse? No, and neither can they, but they’ll try, and often, just “shining a light” will send the vermin back into their holes.
Might you be sticking your nose into someone else’s business? Yes, but look at this way: Someone else already has.
And if we’re going to talk about HURTING, I’ve got to remind you about seriously considering a getting the “Shingles shot.” Most people report unbelievable pain, and people have actually committed suicide to make it stop – No, I’m not kidding. And the fact that you’ve had it once does NOT guarantee that you couldn’t be in for an encore.
Does Medicare pay for it? Not usually, but many insurances do, as do some Medicare supplement plans. Hey, look: Medicare doesn’t pay for a lot of things, like not roller-skating in buffalo herds, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t a good idea.
Looking for something nice to do for an elder you like? Good, then YOU pay for it and call it a gift; besides, you can probably use the karma.
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