Thursday, January 19, 2012

Peninsula Daily News Column 1-19-12 "Home not sweet if not egonomic"

            OK, that’s it! Enough of this post-holiday giddiness! And if you haven’t finished the leftovers by now…well, they aren’t “leftovers,” anymore.
            It’s time to get back to work! And “work” is this “Boomer Primer,” designed to give Boomers (and anyone else who might care to come along for the ride) a list of “Things to Think About” regarding this whole “aging thing.” We’re assuming that you (whoever “you” are) are in your early-to-mid 60’s, or rapidly closing in on same, and have been shocked to discover that your immortality is in question. Ready?
            Most of us steadfastly declare that we want to “stay in our homes.” What most of us mean when most of us say that is that we don’t want to end up in an institution, spelled “nursing home;” now, if “home” happens to be a camping trailer in your ex-father-in-law’s backyard or an apartment immediately next door to several thousand 20-somethings, the above may not be universally true, but if you’re in your own place and you pretty much like it most of the time, it’s probably pretty close.
            Now, look around you (go ahead, we’ll wait) – What do you see? Well, I know, but you can clean that up later – What do you see? Nothing in particular? Don’t feel stupid, because that’s what most of us see.
            Next, picture yourself 15, 20 or 30 years from now; now, what do you see? Do you see slippery stairways? Narrow doorways? Stuff stashed where you have to be your height-or-better to reach it? A “normal” kitchen? A “normal” bathroom? Three steps up to the front porch? A dark hallway with throw rugs? All the bedrooms (or the ONLY bathroom!) on the second floor? You’re beginning to get this, aren’t you?
            Right: If you’re going to stay home, “home” has to like you – And it has to like who you are now, not who you were some other time, so if this is really where you mean to plant yourself, you might want to consider whether or not you’ll be able there if you don’t have the physical acumen of a high school football player which, by the way, you haven’t had for some time.
            I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking that you don’t particularly want to make “home” look like a nursing home – I get it, I don’t, either – But things have a long way since the last time you saw or thought about this stuff, which might include “never.” You could see some of this stuff on the covers of fancy home improvement magazines and think, “Wow!”
            The concept is “universal design,” which means that these modifications make life easier for EVERYBODY, not just folks who “need” them; or you may have heard the phrase, “aging in place,” which can mean several different things in several different contexts, but just take it literally: AGE in this PLACE.”
            Now, what do you see?
            Consider doorknobs, or even just reaching into the mailbox. Turning lights off and on, or water off and on or just using the electrical outlets. Opening or closing windows, or even just changing which way the doors open and close (and, Yes: Wider is smarter!).
            Reaching cabinets? Reaching counters? Reaching the freezer? Go look at the tub/shower.
            And if the only bathroom is upstairs, well…
            Look: There’s a lot of info on this stuff online now; further (Better!) there are folks who specialize in assessing your home for its ability to remain your home, then giving you a laundry list, from which you can pick-and-choose, or better yet, prioritize, so could chip-away at it one piece at a time.
            Expensive? Well, it depends on what you might need and what you might want, but I’ll bet you the price of a brighter light bulb that it’s not as bad as you imagine.
            And do you have to do EVERYTHING that shows up on the aforementioned list? No – You don’t HAVE to do ANYTHING! – But you might want to at least consider the “high points.”
            Try this: Most of us have friends and/or family who are Elders or folks with disabilities, so if you want to hear from the real “pro’s,” go ask them what they did (or what they wish they’d done) – If they think you’re honestly interested, and you’re not “pitying” people who didn’t ask for any, they’ll probably tell you the truth.
            Here’s what most of us do: Nothing; then something bad happens (usually a medical something), and here we are, trying to live in a home that is waiting for who we used-to-be to show up, but we have to live here NOW! – And off we go on a desperate, fearful, emotion-driven foray into the wonderful world of “home improvement,” which is not (usually) when we’re likely to find the best deals or the most competent professionals.
            Here’s the truth: Most of us aren’t willing to do everything we “should” do, right? So, we make compromises, right? Choices. I’m willing to do “this,” but not “that” – Kinda like diet and exercise and…We make choices.
            And we’ve been making choices since we were old enough to have any, so the fact is, nothing has changed, but you might want to take another look around, because it could be time to have a heart-to-heart with “home sweet home.”
           


No comments:

Post a Comment