Thursday, August 23, 2012

Peninsula Daily News Column 8-23-2012 "'New age' hopefully is a 'better age'"

'            I’ve gone on about how loneliness can kill or, at least, mess us up and make things harder. That isn’t news and it isn’t meant to be, but I’ve used it as a way of beseeching you (Us!) to get off of our you-know-whats and DO SOMETHING! By the way, if you haven’t “done anything” yet, today is your next great opportunity!
            Loneliness kills – Yeah, we probably knew that. Then you can throw in the part about depression, which isn’t all that unusual among those of us who have enough experience to actually call it “experience.” And then you can throw in how incredibly complicated life has become!
            No, you’re not imagining it. Just the other day I had a buddy, who happens to be a retired health care professional, tell me that, anymore, you just about have to be “anal” about managing your health and your diet and your exercise and your medications and whatever else – Not to mention your health insurance! – Because health insurance doesn’t like to pay for health care and a lot of people don’t like to pay for health insurance – Especially, yours! – So, there’s more and more pressure to…manage it!
            He’s right.
            Then you can throw in retirement, if you’ve retired, or you can throw in retirement if you’ve realized there’s no hope of retirement – Or you don’t want to, or you don’t know what you’d do, or…
            …you couldn’t afford to, anyway, because you can’t afford to do anything, anyway, so you wish you hadn’t retired, or…
            …then the kids took their kids (Your grandchildren! Who do they think they are?!) and relocated to Atlanta! Atlanta? And here we sit. And sit. And sit.
            Maybe. Not all of us, certainly, and not all of the time, but some of us, some of the time, or a lot of us, maybe – Sometimes. But almost every one of us is nodding about something I said above.
            I am.
            So, hopefully, we do SOMETHING! We don’t just sit there and watch the walls get closer together – We do, SOMETHING! And do you know what one of the things we sometimes do, is? Yeah, you do: We drink.
            Maybe you don’t, maybe I don’t, but many do. I’m just going to ignore Washington’s latest foray into the Wonderful World of the Private Sector, who can, no doubt, handle liquor distribution MUCH better than the government, because I don’t really get it and I don’t really care.
            What I do care about is losing cohorts to alcohol when I need all the help I can get – And so do you. We need all the time, energy, creativity and experience that we can muster to help figure out what will clearly be a “new age” – New ways of living, thinking and financing – So it will, hopefully, be a “better age.”
            I get how it could easily go: Boredom, loneliness, too much time, too little money, uselessness, maybe don’t feel so good – It wouldn’t be tough for a few drinks to help you get through the day – Any day – Especially if having a drink now and then is normal.
            And for many people, it is normal: They enjoy a drink with whomever and go about their lives – End of story. God love you.
            But for some of us, particularly those of us who might be hassling with depression (whether we know it or admit it, or not) a drink could become a “special” friend – And the more “friends” the better, right? And the days and the nights go by a little quicker, a little easier – Until they don’t.
            Because it isn’t a problem until it’s a problem; but when it’s a problem, it’s a PROBLEM! And most of us don’t need another one.
            And pretty soon there are medical problems (just for openers), so we’re back into health care which means we’re back into health insurance and almost nothing “good” happens.
            Am I trying to talk us all into giving up all alcohol forever? Me? Not likely; all I’m saying is that “we,” this society, this community, need all of the wisdom and expertise we can get these days, and it won’t help if we lose valuable people to a bottle. I’m not talking about people with plain-brown-wrappers-sitting-under-a-bridge – I’m talking about just getting through the day. But you knew that, didn’t you? Because you’ve seen it, or you do see it, or maybe you’ve been “there;” if you have, you know there’s a way.
            And for a lot of people, it’s just a matter of saying, “WHOA!” and getting on top of it and getting back to life!
            Wondering? Or wondering about somebody you know or care about? Or live with? OK, here are some easy places to go to learn a little more:
*”Age Page: Alcohol Use in Older People” – http://www.nia.nih.gov/health/publication/alcohol-use-older-people
            If everything is fine, then everything is fine, so go back to whatever you were doing before I interrupted you. If everything isn’t fine, it could be – It can be – If we just stick together.
            And tell the truth.

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